ORIGINALITY
Let’s face it. You are an original person. There never has been a
person just like you. And there never will be. Not even if you are an
“identical” twin.
But none of us is completely original. We all share so much in common
with so many other people. We have common hopes. Common dreams. Common
preferences. Common ways of looking at the world.
Yes, we notice our differences, because they stand out. But mostly,
we share commonalities with plenty of others…and in some cases, with
everyone.
But each of us is still original.
INTENTIONS
If you have heard the expression that “actions speak louder than
words” you will know the difference between intentions and reality.
No matter how much you say you mean something, if you act
differently, you don’t really mean it.
No matter how much you say you want to change a habit, if you do
things that support the habit, you don’t really want to change.
No matter how much you say you want to do something, until you
actually do it, you don’t want to.
There are two ways to align your words and your deeds (That’s
called “integrity”)
1. Change your words.
2. Change your deeds.
Will your good intentions become reality?
Truth
Tell the truth. It is that simple. OK, not quite that simple. Accept the truth. That might be a little harder, as the truth really is different for each of us. Yes, there are aspects of the truth that remain and are “fact”, but there is not a person alive, not even objective journalists or disinterested judges, who does not see facts through tinted glasses, and the “truth” is something different for each of us.
But accepting the truth that others present us is not that easy. Yet, can there be any measure of misplaced pride than to reject the truth someone else expresses just because it is not how we see things? People kill and people hate. People die and people suffer. All because sometimes it is hard to accept someone else’s truth.
It’s good to be right, but it is better to be nice.
Maintenance
Do you have a funny spot? I do. It’s on my head. Sometimes it pops up a week after getting my hair cut. Sometimes two, or even three weeks later. And it seems that each time it pops up a little differently. More than anything, my funny spot dictates when I get my hair cut.
Most of us have funny spots in our personalities, too. Certain things might rub us the wrong way. Or in certain situations we might become suddenly shy or clumsy after a while.
Just as my hair needs maintenance to manage that funny spot, we all need personality maintenance. We need to know what characteristics about ourselves look “funny” or somehow interfere with smooth relationships with others. And we need to take regular measures to manage those elements. Chances are, these are not things we can eliminate (although some might be), but simply to keep a check on them so that they allow us to be pleasant to others and function at our best in our community.
Consider this: you give your car regular maintenance, don’t you?
Fairness
“As a lot of people say in their mind “Life isn’t fair, it’s just fairer than death”
Many people can’t seem to understand that – or at least they misinterpret – the idea of “fairness.” “Fair” doesn’t mean that EVERYONE makes the team or that everyone is good at one certain thing. “Fair” only means that everyone is given a chance – NOT that they will succeed. Fair implies that, while you will not beat someone at one particular thing, you probably will be better than the other person at something altogether different. Fairness does NOT mean that everyone is equal – Fairness just means that there is an opportunity.
Yup, “Life isn’t fair??, it’s just fairer than death”
is your life fair???
blame
What a horrible thing you do to yourself when you blame someone else for just about anything. The minute you blame someone else, you take away responsibility from yourself. That might actually sound like a relief, but it is not quite. Responsibility is control. It is the ability to respond. It is your ability to correct whatever went wrong.
When we blame someone else, we give up the ability to correct what went wrong. And we risk having the wrong remain.
Instead of blaming, you must take responsibility, coz actually…, you can’t blame anything for the bad thing that happened.
waiting(penantian)
What are you waiting for? Well, you might be waiting for a lot of things. In fact, most of us spend our lives waiting.
We wait for someone…
We wait for things to get better…
We wait for something exciting to happen…
We wait for the kids to grow up…
We wait for life to get better…
And what happens while we are waiting? Life…!!!
If life happens while we wait, we have very little control over our lives. If, on the other hand, we choose to stop waiting and create our ideal life, we have much more control over how our lives play out. It’s OK to wait, but the results are much more arbitrary.
Either way, it’s your choice.
DIFFERENCES
Is the world more like a fruit salad or a bag of mixed nuts?
Yes. We are like a fruit salad and a bag of mixed nuts. Every one of
us does dozens maybe hundreds of things that might seem crazy to
someone else. And each of us does a different mix of things in different
ways. It’s OK to be different, as long as different does not mean being
rude of inconsiderate to others. 
So stir in whatever extra ingredients you like; no two recipes are the
same.
imagination
It’s time to build yourself a little cabin. Not a real one like the
pioneers made out of wood and Velcro, but an imaginary one you can build
out of whatever fears and hopes you might have. This is your
confidence room. Or your gratitude room. Or your self-esteem room. Or your
self-control room. Or whatever room you most need to have. This is a
place you can place yourself when you need to remove yourself from a
situation where you lack confidence. Or gratitude. Or whatever you feel
you lack.
Now place this room in your pocket. It is important to bring it with
you wherever you go, because you never know when you will need to pop in
and stock up on confidence or gratitude or self-control. When you
have challenges you find difficult to overcome, it helps to use your
imagination.
VARIETY
If variety is the spice of life, we live in positively seasoned times. Not only does our ice cream come in dozens of flavours and our cars in a choice of colors, but even our shampoo comes in multiple flavours (watermelon, anyone? Or perhaps bubblegum?). And have there every been so many fruits and vegetables available in one place at the same time since the beginning of the world? We can choose what music our phones will play when they “ring”. It won’t be long until we choose what color house we want…this week. And what color we want to change it to next week.
If variety is the spice of life, we are living in the tastiest of times!
